Lane: The differences between the way females and males think is very interesting to me. As a female it is tough for me to support those types of statements as facts versus thinking it is an excuse for men not to be thoughtful.
There are many different ways in which men and women think. This subject was brought up over some pillow talk last night. We were watching the movie "The Host" which is about another soul invading and controlling your body - but if you fight hard enough, you will share your brain with the soul versus disappearing. After a couple humorous jokes about how you could have a relationship with a different soul in your head but share the same body..... I finally asked him if he would want to share a brain together and he shouted "ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!!" Then I thought... Oh, well yeah! I wouldn't want to be like that forever, but it could be interesting for 24 hours. So then I asked him.. "What about for 24 hours??" He responded - "Nope nope nope!"
In a way, I completely understood his response. My mind is full of over thinking and always analyzing a situation -- topped with a ton of curiosity at all times! But at the same time... I also was a little hurt by his response too. Why would he not want to be in my brain for a day to consider what I think - how I'm truly feeling - and how good he makes me feel!
My initial reaction to the question is that I would've loved to look into Chuck's brain for 24 hours!! I'm such a curious person in general....it would be so interesting and very reassuring! So this drastic difference.. made me want to research the differences between men and women and how they think!
My initial reaction to the question is that I would've loved to look into Chuck's brain for 24 hours!! I'm such a curious person in general....it would be so interesting and very reassuring! So this drastic difference.. made me want to research the differences between men and women and how they think!
Communication seems to be the main topic. Women focus on solutions that work for a group, talking through issues, and utilizing non-verbal gestures in order to understand the direction the communication is going. Men are very task orientated, less talkative, and more isolated.
Bonding with others can actually be supported for women by their larger deep limbic system which allows them to be more in touch with their feelings. Men seems to use a "fight or flight" response while women want to "tend and befriend."
Regardless, there must be a reason that men and women were made to think so differently. Women are given the ability to be caretakers while men have the ability to stay strong to protect their family. I get it. But as the world is developing, relationships are changing, and standards are switching... I'm wondering if mind frames will change as well -- the way we think will melt at the same rate that male versus female expectations are melting together.
End note - Relationships take a ton of work. Including trying your best to think of how your significant other is thinking and feeling. I am constantly trying to remind myself that Chuck probably views this situation differently - therefore I make sure to communicate to him how I'm perceiving it -- eliminating confusion or miscommunications. I'm not going to lie and say it is easier either! Seems to take us a couple different communication sessions and a little argument to cure whatever problem we are having but at the end of the day... I know how much we love each other and that our problem that we just had is a great learning experience.
End note - Relationships take a ton of work. Including trying your best to think of how your significant other is thinking and feeling. I am constantly trying to remind myself that Chuck probably views this situation differently - therefore I make sure to communicate to him how I'm perceiving it -- eliminating confusion or miscommunications. I'm not going to lie and say it is easier either! Seems to take us a couple different communication sessions and a little argument to cure whatever problem we are having but at the end of the day... I know how much we love each other and that our problem that we just had is a great learning experience.
Chuck: I totally get where Lane is coming from and maybe due to the time of night my response was a little short and harsh. Not that I wouldn't mind at times to be in Lane's brain but at the same time I have no desire to be...
Mostly because I love the woman she is and like the differences we seldom have. To spend time in her brain I would be worried we wouldn't have those differences anymore. I like being able to not be on the same page with her at times and us explore our differences. I feel it helps build our skills together. I am very different that Lane in that I don;t over analyze things. Mostly because of my career I have to assess the situation and react to it immediately. Second thought could cause so many different things to go wrong is how my mind has been trained, courtesy of the US Army.
Now I would not object to Lane going into my head for a day. At times I think that would be the best as my choice of words at times are WAAAAY off than what I mean. That would def eliminate any confusion between the two of us. But in the end I cherish those moments when I can just stare at her and not have a clue what she is thinking.
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